Cleaner: Chapter One - Part Eleven

DAHLIA

I watched Melissa walk down the drive to the road from the upstairs window and turn left. Above and beyond the hedge on the other side of the lane, the town of Nockton spread out and up the opposite valley wall. The sun was high and it was a beautiful day with almost no haze. Every house was picked out in perfect detail.

It had been... wonderful... to play that silly game for a while. It was just such a shame that Katherine had to ruin it all.

I turned away from the window feeling slightly despondent and wandered back downstairs slowly, not feeling like going back through to the poolside again or reading my magazine. I wondered if I should go out; go on a little spending spree in the Tower Gates centre or, better, the row of boutiques in Farley. I could call in to visit my brother at the same time; see if he was around; though he probably wouldn’t be considering it was a week day. But no. I didn’t have the motivation to do any of that.

I gravitated instead to the kitchen and took out the things to make up a baguette: French bread, low fat spread, brie, rocket, tomatoes, red onion. I put it together, making a mess as I usually did but not caring about that. Melissa could always—

“Hmmm.”

What was to stop me dressing up again now? Pretending to be a cleaner again?

I frowned. I wasn’t sure why it was important but it wouldn’t be the same without Melissa present; without some kind of actual swap taking place.

There. I got that tinkle of sexual arousal again, telling me I'd hit the spot exactly.

Was I really that kinky? And shouldn’t I try to ignore such bizarre impulses?

I was a celebrity – even if I’d embraced my obscurity for a few years – I had standards to think of. I was better than this.

But that didn’t stop me picturing it happen again, letting my eyes go to half mast and my breathing settle.

Melissa lounging by the pool as I scurried round trying to make things tidy...

I smiled.

I had half a mind to pop out after lunch and see if I could find something to wear that would make me look more the part but not swamp me so terribly. Pretending I was Melissa was actually made harder by wearing such oversized clothes. From her perspective, her clothes fit or were actually tight. I could...

Yes. What if I went out and found something that would make me look more like her... and I could even buy something in her size that would make her look more like me.

“That’s crazy. I really shouldn’t encourage myself.”

But I had nothing better to do. And I didn’t have to go through with it. I could just enjoy buying the things and imagining. It didn’t mean I was going to take another step. Melissa wasn’t coming back for two days anyway.

I grinned. That was settled. I was really looking forward to the afternoon now. Really looking forward to it.

I finished making my lunch up and poured myself a grapefruit juice in a tall glass, set it out on a tray and decided to go out onto the patio. There was quite a bit of mess left when I was done but I hesitated before clearing it up, smiling mischievously.

That was the cleaner’s job. How delightful would it be to let the place go to seed a little so that if Melissa and I did do it again then there would really be a lot to contend with?

It was all so absurd, but it was only a harmless fantasy. I probably wouldn’t even do it again. I was just enjoying the possibilities.

I shrugged. That was settled.

I picked up my tray and started to walk out but stopped and looked back at the fridge. Instead of leaving I set the tray down and wandered back, opening it. I’d had a friend to visit the week before and Katherine had bought in a couple of Moorish chocolate desserts for it that we hadn’t got round to eating.

I thought about the cleaner and her huge bloated body; the dress and shoes that didn’t fit me properly. I stroked my own flat stomach, looking at these desserts. Then I took one out and set it on my tray with a teaspoon; thought better of it, and went back for the second.