Man: Wanted: Chapter Seven - Part Nine

Sangeeta jerked slightly. That’s what woke me.

I cracked my eyes open a little then closed them again.

“Did you hear that?” she asked.

“Mmm?”

“What time is it?”

I checked my watch. “After nine.”

“I think I heard the door.”

She shifted again. We both listened. When it went a second time we both heard it got up to a sitting position. I scratched the back of my head with both hands and yawned. We didn’t say any more, simply made eye contact, smiled and kissed.

I got up. “I’ll just be a minute. Pour another glass of wine each.”

She nodded and I went through to the hall. Half way to the door, my mind woke up enough to consider who it might be and then a jolt of adrenaline followed it that wiped the rest of my sleep away. I didn’t need to open it. I knew who it was going to be.

I considered keeping it closed; pretending we weren’t in; but that wouldn’t end it. He’d come back. And I couldn’t run away. I had to confront this and find out what he wanted. I wavered at the door, wondering if I should turn back into Alison so that the meeting could play out as it had to. He wouldn’t be satisfied with my male self if he’d come to see her. But despite the difficulty this could cause with Sangeeta present, I quailed at the idea of turning back into a woman. I couldn’t abide the idea of that; to relinquish this body I loved to become a sleight creature of muddled femininity. My fingers didn’t return to the ring. Instead I opened the door and stepped into the frame.

Billy was there, exactly as I’d expected, looking handsome and well-dressed as always, though taken aback slightly by seeing me answer the door again. He recovered immediately from his disappointment and said, “Hi Geoff. Sorry to break up your evening. I was hoping to catch Alison. Is she in?”

This time seeing him, I wasn’t as bowled over. The female instincts didn’t overwhelm me and undermine my confidence. If anything I felt slightly hostile; protective even. I leaned again the doorway. “No. She isn’t here.”

“Oh. Okay. That’s a shame. When will she be back?”

“What’s this about?”

Billy picked up on the shift in my demeanour. “I was hoping to talk to her. We have some things we need to discuss.”

“You could ring her.”

He flashed a smile. “I think she barred my number.”

“Well I’m not sure where she is and she might be back very late.”

“Oh-kay. Well... I’m staying at the top of town in Breton. In a pub with bed & breakfast. The Old Squire. You know it?”

I didn’t respond. Behind me, Sangeeta had come into the hall. Billy spotted her past me and gave a wave. “Hi. I’m Billy.”

I sidestepped sufficiently to open up the view. She said, “Sangeeta.”

“Pleased to meet you. I’m here for Alison. She’s my wife.”

“Really?”

“Uh huh.”

I sidestepped again, blocking the view through intentionally. “Look, what’s this about Billy? Why are you here? What do you want to talk to Alison about?”

He flashed his smile again. “Well I was hoping to talk to her first directly before I... Okay. If you want you can give her a message from me. Just tell her...” He thought about it for a moment. “Just tell her that I’m sorry and she was right. Entirely right about everything. I love her and I’ve always loved her and I realised that I can’t live without her. If she’ll have me then I want to try and win her back. I’m not worthy of her love but I want to be, and I’ll do anything I can to make things right.”

I gaped back at him, all words gone. While he’d spoken, the entirely masculine side of me that had sceptically answered the door was gone, replaced by the desperately yearning Alison me; emerged from the gloom of my psyche. This was everything I had ever wanted to hear from him and now here he was saying it to me and I was in the wrong body. I was the wrong self.

He stepped back and gave a little nod of his head. “Will you tell her that for me?”

I didn’t respond again.

“The Old Squire. In Breton; just off the Narrows. I’ll be there tonight and tomorrow night and every night until I get to see her.” He smiled. “I messed up and all I can do now is try to make it right.”

He gave a brief theatrical bow then withdrew and I stared after him, unable to believe my ears, but realising that this changed everything.