Man: Wanted - Chapter Six - Part Two

Obviously I didn’t stay and work on the house. I think I’d accepted finally that it was never going to happen. Who was I kidding?

Instead I drove into town in the dickmobile, barely able to get a proper view over the steering wheel and simply dazzled by its deplorable turning circle. Driving it was like wrestling a bear, complete with the growling. Normally when I drove round, if I was lucky, I’d get a few stares, maybe a couple of waves; occasionally a wolf whistle. Riding inside this purpose-built phallic symbol on wheels just rated smirks; maybe a disapproving shake of the head.

I drove into the multi-storey and pulled into a parking bay overlooking the park. Of my many mottos, “If in doubt, shop” was pretty high on the list. And I certainly needed some new clothes.

I toyed briefly again with seeking out the stall I’d bought the ring from but headed instead onto the high street. I worked my way round the clothes shops there for a while then went into Tower Gates. When I was trying on clothes it was actually quite fresh and new. The new hairstyle meant I had to take a different approach and that freshened things up for me nicely. Breaking into the cash my silent partner had made from his plastering job, I bought myself a range of new dresses and some reasonably priced and very flattering jewellery.

It was fun.

It was great to have plenty of cash to spend again. And of course this brought thoughts of compromise into my mind. It was just a shame that I was worried about the man-ring taking over my life. If it didn’t alter my way of thinking so much and I could trust it not to doom me to a testosterone-fuelled fate then it was blatantly clear how useful it was. I wished it just changed me enough to bring the cash in and solve my problems and then gave me back the urge to be a woman.

And of course the social implications were dizzying.

I drove it from my mind, and as I did so I realised where my ramblings had, inevitably, brought me.

Sangeeta’s Beauty Bower.

And no sooner did I stop and realise that I’d been all but compelled to come this way than the door opened and Sangeeta backed out wearing a pretty vermillion coat over her uniform. I gave a jerk to my right that might almost have led to a gangly run but I was too much in the open. She was going to see me either way. With nothing better to do I just stood there gaping at her, my cheeks flushed bright red, looking exactly like I was a creepy girl-stalker, as she turned to face me.

Her face fell two feet when we made eye contact. I was only about six yards away. There was this awful silence and physical hesitation, like she too wanted to flee but was unsure how to.

I started to speaking. “Sangeeta, I was—” but she raised her hand to say stop and started walking off.

“Don’t bother.”

I watched her go past, revolving my body like it was on a turntable. When she was three quarters past, her back almost completely to me, I said, “Sangeeta, wait. I’m sorry.”

She kept moving until I reached the word “sorry.” Then she stopped, but she didn’t turn back.

“I’m really sorry I was such a cow yesterday,” I said.

She lowered her head then she raised it again and looked back at me. We just looked at one another then she said, “It isn’t your fault if Geoff got you to do his dirty work.”

... which made me feel awful; partly because I’d caused heartache to this lovely woman but also, paradoxically, that I’d stabbed “Geoff” in the back.

“I may have... misrepresented his intentions... a little.” I said.

Sangeeta frowned in mock suspicion. “Misrepresented?”

What the hell was I doing?

I shrugged one shoulder. “I... He... Look, can I buy you lunch?”

She gave a blink of surprise. “Are you serious?”

My cheeks reddened further. “Yeah. I just... I feel bad about what happened and I... want to explain – tell you what I should have said.”

Sangeeta looked at her watch then very hesitantly said, “Okay. Sure. I guess. I was just going for a wrap from Tesco but... if you’re paying.”

I brightened. “Let’s go,” I said. “There a lovely little cafe overlooking the river.”

“I know it...”

“My treat,” I said. “Really.”

She turned that way and I walked alongside her.

And I had absolutely no idea what on earth I was thinking.