Workman: Chapter Five - Part Nine

Sangeeta remained sagged against the door, her back to me for a long time, caught up in the swirl of her own thoughts. Then she seemed to recall her surroundings and she straightened and turned to face me, her face dark.

The silence continued. I tried another smile, feeling embarrassed to be caught looking like this – as though I were a cross dresser or something. Her expression didn’t cut me any slack. It was beyond just her frustration with Rasheed. Finding me here; a woman; and no Geoff was obviously unsettling for her. It was unsettling for me!

“So you’re Geoff’s... sister?”

“Alison.”

“And you... live here with him?”

I shuffled my feet. “Sort of.”

“Sort of?”

“We’re not... usually here at the same time.”

“What does that mean?”

I took a deep breath. “We seem to have got off on the wrong foot.”

She maintained her stony stare for a moment longer then let it melt away and frowned at herself. “You’re right. I’m sorry. I was just rattled to come to the door and find...”

“Me.”

“And Rasheed.”

“And no Geoff.”

She raised her eyebrows and smiled. “Where is he?”

The ring was in my curled palm in my pocket, faintly warm. “Out... I don’t know where.”

“Oh.” She folded her arms.

She was wearing a pretty Indian-style outfit – not a sari but evocative of that style. My eyes fell down her body then slid back up and I got another little tingle of arousal. She was really gorgeous. I could still almost taste her lips on mine from the night before but realising that disturbed my train of thought. I shouldn’t be thinking that way. It was unnatural.

Though all I had to do to make it natural was to slide the ring onto my finger...

I could pretend I heard the back door – go through to the kitchen to “check” – make the change and tell Sangeeta that “Alison” had gone out for a walk. If that kind of stuff worked for Superman and Lois Lane then it could work for me.

“Do you know when he’s coming back?” she asked. “He wasn’t answering his phone when I tried to call.”

I shrugged, feeling increasingly uncomfortable. This entire situation was stupid. I shouldn’t be playing along with this. I shouldn’t be entertaining the idea of being with this woman again. However enjoyable it was to be a man, I shouldn’t be wanting to do it again. I needed to put in as many blocks as I could to take away any temptation. I couldn’t change again. That was certain.

“Look,” I said. “I’m sorry about this, but Geoff... He told me about you.”

“What did he say?”

I hesitated but made myself continue. “He said that he thought you were nice but that... He didn’t think he could see you again.”

Her eyes widened slightly then they hardened. “Why?”

I put her behind me. “Because...” I didn’t know what to say. Because basically it was a lie. I knew it was wrong and that I couldn’t let it continue but I also really wanted to be with her again. I couldn’t think of a thing I wanted more. She was just so beautiful, and so funny and warm. I wanted to take her in my arms right now but I knew she would push me away in horror.

I had to be strong. It was wrong to continue with what I’d been developing with her. I had to put a final stop to it.

“I’m really sorry to have to tell you, but he said he didn’t want to see you again. He wanted me to tell you if you came round.”

“Where is he? Why doesn’t he tell me this?” Her eyes were moist. It made my heart reach to see it but I didn’t let myself respond.

“He’s out with some friends. He didn’t want to be here if you called.”

Sangeeta glared at me. “I don’t believe you.”

I met her gaze, trying not to flinch. It was horribly cruel but it needed to be said. I knew that now that I was out of that body. I could think clearly. It wasn’t right to let it go on a moment longer, however much I wanted her, even now. “It’s true,” I said. “I’m sorry.”

The tears brewing in her eyes spilled over and she swiped at them almost angrily. “I was going to tell him... Forget it.” She turned to go.

“What is it?” The words came out before I knew enough to stop them.

She looked back at me over her shoulder, hurt and bruised. “Nothing. Just... Something bad happened today. I was hoping... Just forget it.”

She opened the front door.

I stepped after her; only just stopped myself from saying, “Wait!”

She stood framed in the doorway for a minute, her back to me, then without another word she went out and closed it behind her.