Tuesday, 1 September 2015

CLEANER II: Chapter Five - Part Three

DAHLIA

“Let me tell you what my life is like now,” said Melissa, “all thanks to you.”

We had left her suite and were travelling downstairs in the lift. It had mirrors on every wall, even built into the doors, and gave an uncanny sense of other dimensions shifting off, endlessly repeating images of us that slowly curved out of sight. Melissa was facing the door. She didn’t look my way. I stole glances at her from every angle through the differing mirrored views.

“Because of your support and this grand adventure we’re on, I have lost a phenomenal amount of weight,” she said. “I’m almost as slim as you were when we first met.”

It was true. Her body looked amazing. For quite a long time now it had looked a lot better: simply exercising constantly had enabled her to carry the weight better almost from the start. Now she was very shapely and if anything looked slightly better than I had before we left England.

After all, by then I had let my own weight slip a little already and hadn’t maintained as intense an exercise schedule as her for some time: years. Melissa’s developing form was the result of intensive physical training. And her boobs were a little fuller too.

She didn’t have my facial features (though hers weren’t a million miles from mine), but she was similar enough in other ways that a member of the public who followed my modelling career might almost have thought she was really me – if they were told as much.

“And losing weight is only the start of it,” she said. “Living here as you; enjoying the life of a wealthy woman; something I could never have done before; has changed something inside of me. I see myself differently now. I see a strength and...” She went quiet for a moment. “... a beauty even, that I never had before. I look in the mirror and I don’t recognise the incredible woman looking back at me.”

She turned her body so that she stood beside me and put her arm round my back, gripping the chubby bingo wing on my left arm so that we were looking at our reflections, pressed side by side.

The sight of it was barely credible and dimly disquieting.

She was taller than me; because of her heels and my flat working shoes; because my posture was... different: shoulders slumped; back a little bowed; head lowered. She was so slim and athletic and that gave her a bearing and confidence that was visibly magnificent. My dark brown hair seemed almost black in the soft lighting while her lovely golden curls danced about her face. Her hair had grown massively since we came to Greece. It looked fabulous now.

And I looked tremendously fat: my stomach rolls; my round, sagging chin, my inflated bottom and wide hips, the swollen calves, the round chubby arms. I peered, blinking, through the thick lenses of glasses that covered much of my face.

I looked so much like the original Melissa now. So much like her.

“Thanks to your generosity and kindness,” said Melissa, I feel like a princess. I used to have a drinking problem – did you know that? I used to drink all the time, just to dull the ache I felt from living my life; from looking the way I did.” She grinned. “Not anymore. Now I have it under control. I still drink but only for fun. You don’t know how different that feels. It’s wonderful!”

She hugged me tighter. I said nothing, only smiling a little.

I felt comforted to hear this; to know that she was happy; but I also felt strangely awful and I didn’t know quite why. This had been my choice. It was what I wanted. Why should I feel bad now that I was so close to achieving my outlandish dream?

“I’m so grateful to you,” she said. “So grateful that you gave me the chance to live your life and find out what it’s like. I love it so much.”

She stopped speaking but I sensed there was more she wanted to say. Her eyes clouded and she said nothing. She released my arm and stepped away. I was going to ask her what was wrong but the lift dinged and the doors opened.

Melissa strode out without a glance to see if I was joining her. I scurried after her. I was going to catch up and walk alongside her but that felt wrong. Despite everything I knew about our true pasts, there seemed a gulf between us now that I... didn’t want to close; that I liked. This was what I wanted, wasn’t it? I wanted to be subservient to her; to feel as though she was the wealthy lady and I the portly cleaner with dowdy clothes and hair and thick glasses.

It was my dream come true; or almost. We weren’t quite the same shapes as our opposite had started. The way she was viewed compared to me was startling. It had been a long time since we had appeared together among other people and it was astonishing how differently we were treated now. Men and women openly admired Melissa as she strode proudly along, chin up, apparently unaware of the adulation. Her stride was long and measured. The hotel staff nodded deferentially as she passed but she ignored them.

To me they were openly disdainful, sneering in my direction as I glanced shamefully at them. Everyone we passed either ignored me completely or gave me some grimace of disapproval or derision. And my footsteps were shorter than hers, my pace more laboured with my greater mass. I had to hurry to keep up, frequently speeding up to match hers

Melissa seemed unaware of me now; totally dismissive of my presence, and I started asking myself if she meant for me to follow or if she had dismissed me without even bothering to address me directly. She had been so open and kind in the lift but immediately upon stepping outside, the wall had come down and I was only her underling; largely beneath notice and only worth contempt.

It was horrible; almost a betrayal; and yet it made me feel alight inside, like I craved this desperately; as though this subservience to her and the pitiful life she had crafted for me were was a dingy hell and her disregard was something I yearned for: a light I could gaze at in the darkness.

Melissa strode on and I hurried after her.

I wanted her to remember I was there. I wanted her to be kind to me. But I also hungered after the casual disdain she was capable of showing me. I wanted her to make me feel pathetic next to her. I wanted to feel as though she was so much better than me.









24 comments:

  1. "I used to have a drinking Problem. I drank all the time." I wonder what effect telling dahlia that will have.

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  2. One of your best chapters! Terrific! Boy is poor D messed up. Nice touch that M is is even in better shape that D was when they left - at least as far as being althetic. The scene inthe lift was chilling, 'mirror mirror on the wall, who is the fairest one of all?'
    sinicestly funny that M is 'praising & thanking D - perhaps to bury her?
    Chilling the way D notices how people reaction to 'Miss Western' & & to her as they walk through the hotel. she loves & hates it at the same time.
    Even their postures have changed, D is now slumping & shuffling & having to almost run to keep up & M walks straiht & proud. & striding confidently.. I love the descriptions of their hairs.
    I canfeel the flutterof bat wings decepnding on poor D.

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    1. Thanks Eric! I'm glad you liked it.

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  3. Yes I agree a real stonker of a chapter this is turning out to be. Loving every moment of it - Mike W

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    1. Well stonking is what Emmas do best.

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  4. “Thanks to your generosity and kindness, I feel like a princess."
    That´s what Melissa tells Dahlia before hugging her, expressing her "thankfulness".
    What M really thinks might be more like "Thanks to your goofiness, your neuroses and mental disorders, I now live your life and will make it mine forever."
    Or was her hugging of D actually motivated by a sudden streak of kindness or even honest gratitude? Time will tell...

    marc

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    1. I think Melissa has mixed feelings about it but she's certainly enjoying the irony.

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  5. Perfect! Dahlia loves Melissa in a submissively saphic way, Mellisa has contempt for D. . it makes sense for them to be together so that D can serve M and M can enjoy humiliating her and continuing to steal her identity.Finnfann

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    1. Yes. Dahlia does love her submission. And Melissa loves to press her buttons.

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  6. She didn’t have my facial features (though hers weren’t a million miles from mine), but she was similar enough in other ways that a member of the public who followed my modelling career might almost have thought she was really me – if they were told as m“
    (LOL! you're cheating, Emma)

    Thanks to your generosity and kindness,” said Melissa, I feel like a princess. I used to have a drinking problem – did you know that? I used to drink all the time, just to dull the ache I felt from living my life; from looking the way I did.”
    ( after saying this how in hell is M going to get D to swich lives even in England? I can't wait to see how you do it?)
    “I’m so grateful to you,” she said. “So grateful that you gave me the chance to live your life and find out what it’s like. I love it so much.” (Again after this why wuld Poor D agree to be Melissa?) this reinforced as they wlk through the hotel with M geting the admiration & D geting the despise? abso0ulelhy chilling scene ,. M is now Dahlia & D is now Meliissa totally while they are in Greece

    Only 3 options occure to my feeble brain. 1) M tricks D into having P)Lasric surgey somehow by maybe pretending it is something else?
    2) M brain washes D so throughly that she agrees to swap faces & lives because she loves or HAS to do what M now tells her
    3) M convinces poor D into believing she's no longer worthy of being the famous model Dahlia & is only fit to be fat Melissa, while Meliisa is the onlhy one worthy of going back to be Dahlia in England. That D would disgrace her family & former life & friends now.

    What will Emma chose? Proably none of the above in her twisted genius. But I can't wait.!!

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    1. Well give it time. You'll know soon enough!

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  7. Excellent Emma,
    Dahlia`s acting like a puppy desperate for her "mistress`s attention.
    I like the way you`ve set the scene for the next instalment, where are they going,
    shopping? Wherever it is I suspect that Dahlia is going to find it exquisitely humiliating or enjoyable, which of course is one and the same thing if you suffer from Dahlia`s particular form of masochism.

    BillA.

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  8. Replies
    1. I'm officially published on amazon! I sent you a copy. Thank you for the help!

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  9. To answer those asking why Dahila would do this - I think Emma did an amazing job detailing all the reasons. Her brother died and she couldn't deal with it. Sometimes denial can be so extreme that people disassociate from themselves. From that point on, life is like watching a movie. Instead of experienceing events and emotions directly, it is more like watching some other person experience them. Dahila is also sexually excited by this, and I think we all know what that is like! She isolated herself for a long time after she stopped working. She didn't have time to maintain friendships when she was modeling, as she was being whisked around the world and working all day. Now she feels very close to Melissa, and feels like there is a wonderful man waiting for her. She believes this because she WANTS to believe it, and in a way she NEEDS to believe it. Going back to her old life would mean dealing with the pain of losing her brother, and going back to the loneliness, and that scares her. Of course, if she ever stopped drinking and overeating long enough to think clearly during her free time for more than 5 minutes, she would realize that all she has to do is spend more time dating back home after she gets back in shape, and maybe spend more time with Katherine and maybe even Melissia. But she is running low on free time and her drinking and eating sessions have morphed into full blown addictions. She might never get that 5 minutes of clear thinking...

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    1. Well I couldn't have put it better myself.

      (Shakes Dave by the hand)

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  10. Tut, Tut, there's more going on than this. Dehalia's hard for us to understand because, I hope , we not having a nervous break downor eben have gon ceazy. Temeber D already before her brother's death wanted to swap places with M. Not just in a rathr kinky rolingplaying way either. She wanted to ruin her eyes! That's goingbeyong=d the bonds of fanyasyinto madness. I recommnedto any who havenot read it yet. Cleaner , the fiirst book. We findout that Dalhia had a nervous break down when her parents were killed & stopped working. She proably still han't totally recovered & her brother & Katherine are thinking about having her committd again.
    Of course her brother's death sends her completely over the edge into going abroad & titally swapping places with M.
    Well now is kind enough to thank her for letting her be the wealthy &veautiful Miss Westerm. & lookks like she's going to give the poor patetic 'M' a treat by takingher out with her. HOw KIND.

    Emma, don't forget about the voices.
    Also, have you given any more though to laskit eye surgerny for M? Its commonplace now & is over in a day.

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    1. Hi Eric,

      I'll think about the eye surgery but there's a good reason for not doing it that I can't tell you.

      And I haven't forgotten about the voices.

      Emma

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  11. I'll take your word for the eye operation of course as its your story! LOL!
    More 'cheeky' observations. One of the many reasons for its fasicnationecept for the obvious
    M motivations are of course clear enought, envy, hatred, greed, even vengence.
    D's remain to some extent ( perhaps fortunateely ) a deep mystery known only to D & your very devious mind. Some guesses ( only guess's) that D somehow feel tremendous guilt & feels she should be punished. Maybe she feels gulilt about the death of her parents, also losing their susport undrcut her sense of securiey, then D may feel guitly about what she may feel is her underved success in life, unfair it is that she should have so much & be worship for only her physical looks, ever since she was a kid, who is she really? Whom people see or the lowly unworthy person she feels she is? & of course the guilt on the neglect of her brother. She wasn't even there when he had his operation. Maybe this is part of the reason she feels she should be punished & humliated. Perhps one day we will find out? Perhaps not.
    Some speculations on the fasinations of your story. First of all a Prince & Paumpr type plot is always popular, more important is the power & skill of your writing to make the unbelievable believable. Hats off to you,

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    1. Thanks Eric. It is interesting trying to get inside Dahlia's head, but be careful! If you delve too deeply you may get stuck there and find yourself living her life for real!

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  12. LOL its dangerous too study madness, you might get too close & ecome mad yourself. I know a shrink who reluctanty says that half of those in their profession are nuts

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